As my internship draws to a close in the coming weeks, I continue to dread the fact that in about three weeks, I'll once again be unemployed. This leads me to the most frustrating aspect of this internship: That during this time, I've also had to look for employment, which of course, in my county is non-existent thanks to our ever so benevolent county and state government.
Don't get me wrong, the case workers and supervisors who have been with me throughout this time have been very helpful, from getting me glasses, to helping immensely with my resume among other things, so I don't blame them one bit for my frustration.
My main problem lies in the fact that the county I live in is virtually dead, especially after cutting off the shuttle program...What I'm saying is this: I'm giving up looking for work. Why? Because it's a literal race to the bottom. Nowadays employers want peons they can exploit just long enough to extract what they want and get the fuck out.
And here's what's worse: I can't leave, because that would mean my mother-in-law would have to leave her job, and of course, without that, we'd be screwed.
Do you see now why I'm so god-damned cynical and angry at times? It's because of the fact that we have the potential to make the world better for everyone as a whole, and yet many times we do just the opposite.
You can tell me to keep my head up, that the right job will come along all you want, but that ship sailed long ago. I've been punched and kicked more than most will ever know. Like I said, I'm done looking for employment, because it's clear as day there is none for one like me.
Honestly, I'd much rather fight for people instead so they don't have to be punched and kicked or just forgotten by the system like I have. I've basically thrown my hands up because I have no clue what to do anymore. You see, even if I learn to drive, it doesn't take away the fact that I'd have to work insane hours because, of course, the only thing that matters is money. Hell, we have a legal obligation to keep our 'job creators' profitable for fuck's sake, and of course these same assholes have no legal obligation to benefit the communities they've raped for decades. Small wonder the economy's so hostile to our own well-being.
The reason I'm writing this is because I'm angry. I'm angry because sometimes it feels like no matter how much effort I put in, at the end of the day I'm right back at square one and have little to nothing to show for it.
Sat Dec 22, 2012 at 6:32 AM PT: I appreciate the rescue, though I'm not sure it's deserved.