Daddy
I used to talk to my Father about many things and when he'd say, "Who cares Jeanie"? I'd get mad. "I care", I'd cry! Then Daddy would say again, "who cares" (that you care), and I'd say I care (that I care). Finally, after going back and forth he'd say, "well what are you going to do about it if no-one else cares"?
I am feeling my raising right now. I CARE.
Dear Diary,
The Democratic Party is racist. The Republican Party is racist. Where do we move on from that?
Michelle Nunn will win the Senate race after a run-off and none of the black women will win except maybe Valerie Wilson, I don't know who told that lie. I heard Buddy Carter(R) is going to be my next Congressman from a sitting democratic elected official and I told him I don't want to hear that this early, the primary isn't even over; stop saying that!
Reminds me of what someone once told me with a wag of the head and a look of reproval, "it is what rich white people do Jeana Brown, they sit around and decide outcomes of elections in their spare time".
See, I am white, privy to all kind of dumb shit and some really scary, stuff dear diary; that is why I write to you.
I see white people. I see white people writing checks, old white people. Some Republicans are even being "coaxed" back to the Democratic Party in Georgia so write a check. That is the wholesale bottom dollar line, I mean lie. Money is not the root of evil; in my estimation classism is.
I am white, I see and hear things privy to white folks. The caveat there is because I am poor and white other whites don't see me in the room and they talk shit or better yet they pretend I am like them, or as it sometimes happens, when I do speak they call me names like "Demigod". So, tales are told and I am vilified. It's ok. What does one do when the cog does not fit the wheel?
I find myself at the end of my term as 1st Congressional Chair at the Democratic Party of Georgia. I have been able to start three new county parties, reorganize four, teach Votebuilder and campaign tactics to other vibrant counties and to others I have been denounced. I call those "truant counties". They do not hold regular meetings and sometimes one or two persons are in charge. As long as they can fudge papers to the State Party, I guess the Party thinks they are viable. I say they are not viable to the process or democracy, but viable to machine politics, like a cog in the will of God; sorry dear diary, I mean wheel of democracy.
It is of great interest to me that I heard numbers being read on our Democratic Executive Meeting Committee call concerning # of phones dialed, # of doors knocked, and #contacts made which is about the time I smiled inwardly thinking: my work here as an organizer is done! We have an acting Democratic State Party who is becoming enlightened and empowered on how to exactly win something in Georgia and then I realized truth. It is all for nought. It is a let down, let me assure you so I will explain my feelings.
I hear winning the Senate seat is the most important thing in Georgia. I think it falls far short of what I want to see from a governing body of people who move society as a shepherd moves a flock to graze. We have not helped anyone in Georgia by allowing the elephant back in the room and that's when I realized the elephant never left.
My perception has changed, thank you clarity.
We have fallen short as leaders, principals, and witnesses as to the true affect of our own governance and by remaining silent I have consented in it's compilation of tasks and completion of its' goals; not goals of winning a campaign, championing the working class, or delivering social services to needy, hungry, hurting people, but the goal of keeping good people OUT of their electoral system.
That is unless you can write a check. Then they laugh at you anyway. What-chu-say! Yes, I said it, they laugh at you anyway.
You can write a check out and believe me the political machine doesn't care about you. How silly of you! Silly of you to think they actually care about you, your money, the voting process, or the living, breathing, citizenry? The system is broken dear diary, it has been broken for a very, very long time.
I come from a long line of organizers, dissenters, and non-conformists. Union-strong Progressive ethics inculcated from birth drive my every action. My people (meaning anyone who feels like me) refuse to participate in bullshit.
As my Aunt said, "Your Grandfather taught you never back down". Yes, he taught me well. Thank you, Grandfather.
I have observed and noted behaviors, events, and reasoned what does it all mean? Help me dear diary to figure it out.
I have observed a City Attorney's wife who in the last midterm could not get a call back from the Gubernatorial Campaign! I mean after all, she was a Georgia State Committee member, she held fundraisers for Roy before the primary, (something our bylaws recluse Party members from doing) and she "used" to have his cell phone number. She called me demanding that someone call her back.
When I got someone at Roy Barnes Campaign it went like this:
"Roy's not going to call her back".
With exasperation, "There are circles people are in Jeana Brown and Jane Doethinks she is in a circle where Roy is and she is not there are circles above her Jeana Brown and there are circles above Roy and Roy only has a certain amount of finite time".
"Jane Doe is not that important, and he is not going to call her back" was the word.
A simple ask for Roy to call party leaders in my own community was joked about, and laughed at. I didn't see the humor in it. I never told Jane Doe of her degradation, I wasn't raised that way. I was after all an Obama Organizer taught to Respect, Empower, and Include people even if they "thought" they were whiter than me.
So, I could not understand why a Democratic Candidate for office would not call "leadership" in my county. Where was the reward in breaking by-laws? Where was the love?
I can't help myself diary, it reminds me of the old story the Emperor without his Clothes.
If supporters with money were left naked, unattended, and uncared for where did that leave volunteers and newcomers to the political process like me and others?
During that cycle I was told:
With conviction, "we just want people to vote, not think Jeana Brown...I mean it's ok if you think, Jeana Brown, but not for the average voter if you know what I mean, we just want them to show up and vote Democratic".
I see now, it is to keep the STATUS QUO. They do not want the electorate changed.
No answers to questions as an elected official either and still racists and bigots plot courses like golf. I must say that it has never been clearer to me that the Democratic Party runs nothing. It must pretend to be broke and penniless to engage people on political levels of illusion. The truth has become to painful to bear.
I have contemplating not voting. It is easy for me to disengage. I did not vote for 32 years by choice. I voted for Jimmy Carter twice and then I quit voting. Reagan made me plum sick for many reasons.
What people in power do not know is that people on the streets know things. Like we knew the police and army were distributing drugs before the Iran Contra Affair was revealed during Reagan's' administration, because everything is LOCAL.
So here is the problem: People on the streets know that local elections are rigged (national elections proved themselves rigged all the way to the supreme court) and I have actual proof locally. Will we put some folk in jail? I doubt it. The only ones going to jail are people who have tried to circumvent the machine. Like the good people in Quitman, Georgia, they should make a movie about that.
I have learned so much about Georgia's methodology to suppression and it's modality of using authority. like the Secretary of State, the Georgia Bureau of Investigation, the State Police, along side County Sheriffs and local Municiapl Police etc.(Brooks County Georgia's Quitman 10+2 read this and see 4 years of hell as innocent political participants engage at their own local level)
A word to the local mokels there, now that this case has been thrown back to the local level, You have been thrown out of the circle just like Miss Jane Doe and other rural counties. YOU all suffer from Big Fish in a little Pond Syndrome and that creates undo unethical hardships on ordinary citizens. We are sick and tired of that little lie austerity.
I am an elected official dear diary and I can not run people for office without death threats on them, threats on their businesses and families. So now I ask who does get to run for office? Movie Stars, Mokels, and Madams? Pixies, Fairies, Trolls? It is all for nought; feel the pain and the hurt. The breakdown is coming as we are assisted by internet, information, and accountability. Municipalities is where the real challenges lie. Municipalities are hurting good people and I am going to #Fergusoniseverywhere dear diary I'm just putting it out there.
Ordinary people know extraordinary things. People are not left to their own devices, they are aware. So maybe the government should be watching it's citizens. They could learn a lot from good people on the ground. Sadly, there are circles who have their own agendas and motives and it has nothing to do with a two party corporate system. It has to do with Labor and Economics. Who gets, what, where, when, and how.
So National and State Democratic Party: stop sending me requests for money, please. The Democratic process is nickel and diming me to death and winning absolutely nothing for working class citizens. I have personally unsubscribed from every single one of them and I consider NOT VOTING. Do I see that as undemocratic? No, I see it as a reality check.
Hold a fundraiser.
Be "in" the Michelle Nunn circle. Oh yeah.
Have any fundraisers in Georgia been having a hard time getting a phone call back? I bet.
I heard that Carter didn't have time to attend a fundraiser so I guess he has all the money he needs.
Yeah right.
Volunteers can't get an email or a return call either. I hear from them quite a bit.
I was told not to show up with 8-10 people at Michelle Nunns campaign office, I was told to go by myself at first to volunteer for Michelle Nunn and not to ever say the word "Obama". I'm like f*** that shit. Dear diary I am sick and tired of it.
Blatant-outright-racism.
Blatant-outright-classism.
So what's up with that?
It is called entitlement. It is elitism, it is racism. When working in Georgia during the 2012 Presidential cycle I found dis-ease and unrest with myself. I have not known what to do. It is not well with my soul because good people still suffer including myself. That is heavy. To heavy for one to carry. Can we carry it together dear diary?
Easy, malign and marginalize black, and poor white. Keep the racist/classist attitudes and pretend to Get out the Vote. That was my take away.
I am unable to pretend in this life. You see I only have this one life and I have chosen to live with authenticity and nobility. I am sharing here with you bumper stickers and business cards that were distributed in NW Georgia and it was down right embarrassing for me to watch people's expressions as they read the cards while looking at the visual clues all the while making assumptions based upon the logo and thought provoking commentary printed therein.
I saw the wretched look of bewilderment after Obama supporters looked at me wanting to know what it meant?
Front
Someone looks very Presidential
Who were the cards messaging to? I'd bet old white men.
Were the cards good or bad? I don't know but I will say as a past Obama Organizer, I know that a Campaign will create logos etc. and they control the message and I know Obama's folks did not approve that message and I can even today find no basketball logo put out by the President's Campaign.
A few evenings later after the card incident democratic county party leadership were gathered behind the office drinking wine and soda, talking happily about the election cycle. When time came for folk to get up and go home, I lingered because I was living right across the street in a loft apartment donated as supporter housing for me to live in while I worked as the office manager. The County Chairman at the time owned the apartment and indeed lived next door. So, I thought since we were the last two there I'd walk over with him when he got up to go.
He was elderly and as per my raising I was asking him innocent questions about his childhood and his life (I learn by speaking to my elders) and in that talking I shared that my Great-Grandfather was 10 years old when he began working in the coal mines and how they organized for dignity in 1921.
When out of the blue came the remark, "do you know what my Great-Grandfather did"? "He owned a Plantation, and he told people like you what to do, so I am telling you, your job is NOT to get Obama elected your job is to get 'so and so' elected. You are as replaceable as a printer, a chair, a desk, a pencil. Do I make myself clear?"
Now dear diary, I was a long way from home. I was paid half in advance and I was committed to finishing the political cycle there so to say it took the air out from under my wings is to minimize it. I went home and drank myself to sleep, I was so torn. The next day I rounded up the ugly business cards (with permission from staff) and put "Free Hugs" on the whiteboard sidewalk sign and worked hard until election day.
He is old, I was told, he was wrong to say that.
I say that there are too many like him all across the south who sit around making decisions for the rest of us and they feel entitled to do so. I wonder if my county leader is in "his" circle of influence then again, there must be so many more circles of wealth above that so what to do? As for me I continue the work I was given, to Respect, Empower, and Include all my Brothers and Sisters in communities everywhere I work.
Empowering people, including people, and respecting people, thereby loving them.
Isn't it all about Love?
I love my community leaders who can't get a call back. I love the misguided whites who think it is their turn this time around.
I love our President and want to make strides to stop this corporate democracy from stealing our country completely.
I love people. I love myself. So do I belong in Politics? Does someone who cares belong in politics? On the surface one would say Yes!
Underneath where the current runs fast and deep can a caring person swim while caring? Can they withstand personal and financial attacks? Most can't, won't, and don't.
I once held and organizational meeting with about 15 people in 2009 election and a black man announced if anyone attending that meeting had anything to loose they better not attend my next months meeting. Guess what? The next month there was n-one at the meeting. Certainly not him. He had asked me if I knew who ran that county? I didn't care was my reply. Silly me to think that registering voters after an election cycle could cause so much fear. I saw the signs in 2009.
It is a fearsome place to stand in the Lions Den. It is fascinating to watch as spirit and truth unravel lies and matter. New values are for future governance. We must value all people. I have seen the dismissal of rich white folks concerns in the Party so we people on the streets know how to care for each other whether they know it or not.
This is the way of Labor, Community, Brotherhood and Sisterhood, Unity, Light. It doesn't flow in a man-made direction it flows with indirection by discretion to meet eternal ends. Not man made ends. I delight in that and so I have found a way dear diary from my dis-ease with self and the Party.
I have found we are all in this together whether "they" (elitists) know it or not. Which is kind of funny when one thinks about it. The blind leading the sighted.
I see black people. I see black people teaching. A Gullah Geechee teaching is Cracker the Teeth. What does it mean? It means snap your teeth closed. Do it!
Hear the crack of the teeth together? Hold that pose for a moment and you will be able to listen. With listening comes discernment. I learned "cracker the teeth" to shut up and learn something. Georgia's Democratic Party has given me a good ed-u-ma-cation:
1. Racism is alive and well in this Party.
2. Municipalities are killing Communities
3. Austerity is a Lie.
4. Keep People in their Place.
Now that I am on Food Stamps, Medicaid, and divorcing it would seem I have nothing left to lose. I have truly lost everything I started with as a newcomer to politics. My children fully support my every endeavor and I never do anything haphazardly.
It is dangerous to say the things I have said. It is dangerous to give Free Hugs in Georgia! I wish it were only about winning a Senate seat, but it is not, it is the fate of #Fergusoniseverywhere (communities) that is really at stake. Do we go on allowing racist leadership to make decisions in back rooms? Why hasn't our past Chairman been indited for stealing from the Democratic Party of Georgia? I have some leads I'd love to give a federal investigator. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. We need an intervention for recovery.
What about the leadership we have now? In my last diary Django in Georgia I break down my conversations with the two men running for Chair. I will now reveal that Chairman Dubose Porter never answered my three questions and he only alluded to action on one issue-a rural caucus/council. THAT has been stopped dead on the tracks. I thought we'd get one like Texas and Massachusetts is doing this cycle. That way we could have helped statewide candidates. NO, that would have upset an apple cart.
Lastly what about our "Fab Five" women who don't have the gasoline to make it around the State? From one of those dear women, "Nothing but lies Jeana Brown, nothing but lies. No money from the Party, nothing but promises and lies".
I noticed ten hours agoReuters is telling a lie. The lie is the shift. It is a herring thrown out to get black people to the polls. The Party picks people they know will not win for their own reasons. So here goes the dog and pony dance again. The two Party System or I mean Illusion.
I see black people. I see black people riding in cars, busses, and vans. I see black people voting for all the black folk. I see black people telling this story at church this weekend. I see black people at their breakfast tables pissed off because our Minority Leader Stacey Abrams is called "Queen Stacey" and disrespected and Michelle Nunn won't help the Fab Five even if they are all women. The Fab Five are on the ticket to draw out a certain vote. They are being used and they have no help.
I see black people bursting the doors down this Tuesday. I see Black people lined up with White People like me, us, to upset the STATUS QUO. Let's vote for every black down the ballot to dogcatcher so I won't have to have Buddy Crater (R) as my next Congressman. I pray to goodness and grace that large precincts like Coffee County Georgia turn themselves out for the anger. By word of mouth let us turn out our friends to vote. We have got to stop this shit where it starts. LOCALLY, locally. local. So this time next year we will know the game and we will win more seats like Brooks County did LEGALLY.
Who gets what, where, when, and how of Jeana Brown? I will tell you my decision dear diary.
What: I am voting for all blacks on the ballot.
Where: I am voting every moment through every conversation.
When: I am voting this Tuesday, election day until I don't have to anymore.
How: By the power of the people. Freedom Riders to the Polls.
I will vote for Michelle in the runoff, or maybe not. I was already told she will win the run-off dear diary how silly of me! Well, maybe I will vote for Jason. I did vote for his Grandfather and I respected him a lot.